Resilience is the ability to quickly bounce back from disappointments and set-backs, and to not let them over-shadow us.
Looking at children, it’s easy to see that they are often more resilient than adults. They have the uncanny ability to live in the moment – the present – and enjoy what they have now without judging and without wanting for the whole world and more. Children have less expectations allowing them to learn from experiences and without this lessoning their being able to “dream big”.
How do we lose elasticity or our resilience?
One thing that really makes us less resilient is when we go into situations ‘wanting’ or expecting a particular outcome. When we ‘want’ something in this way we end up in a position of weakness that leaves us feeling empty. Then if things go awry, our minds take off on a tangent and there is nothing we feel we can do to stop the spin cycle we get stuck in.
Resilience building
First, take a look behind and see why you want something. Ask yourself, ‘Why do I want this?’ and keep going until you have peeled away all the layers. Most likely, you will end up with a single layer thinking that this thing is what will bring you peace, love, or happiness.
This peace, love and happiness that we want are in fact primary motivators behind almost everything that we do. As children, we experience these naturally. As we grow, however, we move away from being these. We are taught that peace, love and happiness are commodities that we have to go out and buy or attain somehow. We forget that they are what we are.
We can re-build our resilience by focusing on and experiencing our inner peace, love and happiness. Sitting quietly, reflect and meditate on peace, love and happiness. The more we increase our experience of these inner states of being, the more they become our natural state which in turn influences our way of thinking.
Eventually, we can have such resilience that in the face of disappointment we are able to remain upbeat, silence the negative commentary and find the benefit in what before would have been a major disappointment to us.
RESILIENCE: BOUNCING BACK
Resilience is my back up to use in life, and for this I have to be prepared.
If I love myself enough and want to be successful internally, I have to do my homework before a challenging situation comes.
I have to make my mind’s muscles strong. Then, it’s easy to make decisions.
- In a situation it may be that I need to rise above it, that is, change the perception of how I see things. The key to being able to do this is to know myself beyond the external roles I am playing. I have to spend time going inside to access the skills/ tools within me as I cannot get inner strength from anyone else. This is where inner strength is born.
- My mind is like a computer and is where everything happens. Spend some time to detox it. 10 minutes in the morning and evening say, spend this time empowering yourself with positive qualities and powers by reminding yourself of them and emerging them: peace instead of confusion; lightness instead of burden and pressure for example. Even one second of experiencing of inner peace changes you, without hard work too.
- To bring quality to my life:
– Let me learn from whatever comes in front of me, when I learn the lesson it won’t come again.
– It is key is to realize that I am greater than the circumstances.
– I need to accept the law: If there’s a problem there must be a solution. It is my responsibility to find it and demonstrate to myself that I am stronger than the problem.
From: https://www.innerspace.org.uk/